Ironic “Rain on my Wedding Day” Lesson for the Conscious Fitness & Wellness Lover
“There is more wisdom in your body than in your deepest philosophy.”
~ Friedrich Nietzsche
Those who are aspiring or current fitness and wellness pros may relate with some of these questions that arise, such as…
- which group fitness certification do I want?
- what are the best C.E.U.’s to support my professional goals?
- how do I position myself as a coach or fitness instructor so as to connect best with my clients?
- and the most common question…how can I truly make a difference in people’s health (particularly those in highest need) and still make money???
These and many other decisions arise not once, but continuously in the fitness-wellness biz journey.
So how does one make these important and resurfacing decisions throughout a fitness-wellness career?
1) From the head? Listening to everyone else, including all the voices in our own heads? Doing what is most logical or strategic? Analyzing the decision, thinking about it to death, and then make the decision?
2) From the body? Feeling into our heart, emotions, and soul? Moving and breathing and allowing the answer to arise from a deeper knowing?
- – Lets start with a story, one so bittersweet that I have told very few people.
My wedding day….
And yes, it RAINED and POURED and STORMED on my wedding day.
“It’s like raaaaaaaain on your wedding day…” (I can hear Alanis singing it now).
And I am no longer married, just so you know.
But this day was the beginning and end of being able to “hear” my body (until years later after the marriage ended and I began to soften back into being able to drop into and trust my body’s wisdom, but that’s another story!).
Aside from the biggest storm in years hitting the day of our beach wedding, and an ancient Redwood falling down on our ceremony location, I had a spontaneous injury in my low back from movement during our wedding night that left me immobilized and in excruciating pain.
Talk about universal warning signs as a prequel to my body having to scream at me because I simply was not listening to it.
Yep, I sustained an injury on my wedding night that literally and metaphorically left me with a chronically quiet and sometimes loud pain in my side…for years.
In retrospect, not a total surprise, as I forced and pushed myself into this life-altering decision from a head space desperate to feel authentically aligned in my body and brain on the other side of marriage. I wanted to make the fact that I was in love and having sex “right” in the eyes of my family and their religious beliefs, and so over-riding all the signals in my body I fast-tracked our relationship into marriage.
Ironically, just before having sex on our wedding night, my body screamed a shooting pain from my right side. I couldn’t move.
My “right” side was letting me know what was wrong…! (Wow, even writing about this pain in my side I begin to feel its phantom pain, hmm.)
That night my body was making one LAST DITCH effort to communicate to me around this decision, and I CHOSE not to listen.
And within days I knew in both body and head that I had not made the best decision to get married, but I continued to choose to ignore what I knew and push forward regardless of any storm, challenge, or physical pain to do what I thought was right.
It was a crystal-clear knowing, and I just buried that knowing deep into my body and ignored it. Wow.
Until later when I could no longer ignore that relentless pain in my side.
Isn’t it ironic?!
- – I share this very intimate story to exemplify why I know to the core of my being the importance of including our body-mind in the decision-making process.
Our body knows.
And it remembers.
Even if our minds tell us otherwise or “think” ourselves out of listening to it let alone even considering it.
We need to be less in our heads and more in bodies, especially to be the most effective fitness and wellness changemakers we can possibly be.
And this applies both to our personal and professional choices! Marriage is one of those decisions that I consider to be both a heart and mind decision, it is both about love, commitment, and business.
Just as in marriage, being big-hearted purpose-driven movement advocates and leaders, we need to walk our talk in all aspects of our lives and truly check in with our embodied voice when choosing things like…
what certification to get
how many classes to say yes to
how many clients to take on
and how best to show up for our fitness-wellness client community so as to create the most connection.
Getting away from the “SHOULD” and moving towards what we “DESIRE” for ourselves and others in our work is crucial!
Marriage is a matter of the heart and a matter of the mind. Could be thought that healthy decision-making follows the rule that for matters of the heart then follow the heart and matters of the mind follow the mind. Or vice versa.
But when your business is your passion and heart, how does it make sense to make decisions from the head? The new paradigm fitness and wellness biz guru must consider both “minds”…the brain-mind and the heart-mind.
But above all, the body must rule over the head. No matter what. Every single time.
There within lies the yes.
Anything else other than a full-bodied ‘yes’ is a ‘no’. No matter what the head says.
So, purpose-driven, big-hearted, conscious fitness and wellness entrepreneurs or pros (i.e., group exercise instructors, trainers, wellness coaches, etc.)…
are believers and preachers of physical movement and mind-body practices.
How in heck does it make sense that we preach it, implement it (maybe) in our personal lives, but not fully in our work and not at all in our business decisions????
- – One thing I try to do more often these days when making small or big decisions is get into my body.
Well, I don’t think there is any formula or one-size prescription for “getting into your body”.
Go for an outdoor jog or hike, stretch, breathe, dance, play with your kids, swing on a tire swing, jump on a trampoline, surf, ski, meditate, a dance fitness class, a mind-body fitness class, a yoga class, whatever!!!
But whatever it is, do it with presence and mindfulness, dropping out of the head and into the body.
Allowing thoughts of past or future to quiet down and be present with the now, in your skin, with your soul.
The only 2 requirements are: 1)ENJOY it, and 2)be PRESENT of mind, body, and spirit.
If only for one moment, or one-minute…
Or for longer…
Either way, these moments open up the opportunity to make a choice and decision from our heart-mind allowing us to be guided by our inner wisdom rather than something or someone else.
We are often the instigators of movement and promoters of physical activity in our social groups and in our fitness-wellness work, so we have fallen in love with the benefits of exercise for a reason!
That reason is because we have experienced the magic of embodiment, of tapping into that somatic awareness for optimal health potential.
We must remember that our power stems from moving into our bodies and being more in our bodies and less in our heads… Let’s commit ourselves to using that power when making decisions in all aspects of our lives and work!
—KEEP CALM AND LISTEN TO YOUR BODY—
(One thing to note, running on a treadmill while multi-tasking on the iPad or watching tv isn’t necessarily bad, but for the purpose of connection to heart-mind and clearing the brain-mind, probably not ideal (wink wink). That isn’t to say that I don’t have some of my best conference calls or phone coaching sessions while out on a walk or hike, because I absolutely do! There is value in doing our work while moving for sure and can add a beautiful piece of inspiration and juice for productivity that is harder to achieve when behind a desk, especially for those on the fitness and wellness journey (insert smiley face)!)
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